Speaking, your truth can be scary, especially when you tend to hold so much in. Today, was the day, I revealed some of my deepest thoughts about myself, him, and us as a whole. I always, thought reconnecting with a old love would be like a scene in the movie “The Notebook”, but sadly that has not been my personal experience. A year ago, I was very naive about him, and maybe still am, but something inside of me has changed. Now, I am ready for a true commitment, happiness, and to fully embrace life. Something about him tells me otherwise, I am sure he is not to use anyone like myself, and most people are not. Yes, I will admit to being a bit weird; however, at the end of the day I am good natured person coming from a very honest place. You would think with a 16 year age difference, he would be stable, but age does not define a persons maturity level. Speaking your truth out loud or silent will always bring out needs one did not even know one had. For example, in all of our conversations, he could never give me a concrete response, which I did not even realize until I started analyzing the our situation in my head. I do not know what will happen next, but in time we should see. Remember, do let the fear of losing something or someone silence you from speaking your truth in a healthy respectful manor. Never bring anyone else down, because you are feeling upset about a uncontrollable situation, because then you will never find clarity. In the end, I will let clarity find me, and keep living this beautiful life.
My Uncensored Journal 